This is probably gonna be the longest day of my life…. I should say the longest time in my life. You think it is bad enough not being able to go back to your normal work for 4 months and still waiting on a CT scan to see the extent of your injury, but today I had to go to the doctor to see what is going on with my neck. Since late last year, I have been suffering from pain in my neck. It started off every now and then waking up in the morning, then evolved into pain everyday. Some days worst than others. Then about a month ago, it felt like my spine was being crushed. My neck and my body just felt weak and I feel over onto the bed. It was so painful…. I felt dizzy and it felt like I was gonna go deaf…. after that, I have been feeling tingles and numbness in my fingers on both hands. It’s most evident when I have a pain attack in my neck, but is always there.
The doctor this morning said he is gonna try and get me into a specialist ASAP. He wants an MRI done on my neck to see if there is anything pushing on my spinal cord…
Why me? Why is this bad luck happening to me? First I might have to get surgery on my knee, now, if anything is pressing against my spinal cord, that is a major and risky surgery!
It would mess up my school, my jobs, my life. Then on top of that I will still have my knee injury….
It is gonna be the longest day of my life. Bouts of crying, feeling sorry for myself, and not to mention that it is always going to be on my mind until I find out what is going on…..
It makes me wonder what I did to deserve this…. I am only 21 years old and everything lately is just getting to be too much…
I don’t know what to do.